EPMD, "You Gots to Chill"

Everybody knows that telling somebody to “chill” does not work. Implementing this seemingly pacifist request is, in the utmost, aggressive; I’ve always felt that the assertion just affirms the accusers relative calm in hopes that the recipient edges ever further to fury. And, sure, it’s the title of EPMD’s poppingly mellow “You Gots to Chill,” but I feel the real commandment of “chill” occurs a few lines in: “But if you tired, go take a nap.” They begin us, then, at infantilization. Or, at the most generous, toddlerization.

EPMD are kind enough to reiterate - perhaps too late for the overanxious or naive - that they “don’t like to get ill” but will “kill” if provoked. The beat, itself an essential form of electronic kickback and relax, suggests a lowering of the guard. But in this song, EPMD construct a chill of menace, and, in the best traditions of brashness, pick themselves up while suggesting others get down - or get stomped. Self cast as heroes, geniuses of infinite skill and wit, EPMD are too happy to remind us all as the song concludes that they aren’t the ones who “gots to chill.”

Perhaps the best back patting comes in the form of allusions. Tonally, “Terminator” is way off, but as a brief blast, it hits. More efficiently used is the echoed “Zorro,” a man whose “rappin’ sword” would surely be “swift” - though I doubt he’d feel the need to call in his “Uzi patrol.” Like EPMD at their finest, Zorro commits to suave, assured murdering, the kind that only happens while in “total control your of body and soul.”  Their challengers, mere “boys,” are tauntingly warned to bring “shield and armored gear.” But, right after, are paradoxically reminded: “You gots to chill.”

It’s a summative sign off: Fingers of warning raised, smiles showing teeth, EPMD conclude by simply “standin’ still,” while their enemies, draped in battle garb that will never see action, sweat profusely.